Is It Time for an Upgrade?

Have feelings of shame, pain or stress ever sent you in search of understanding?

500 soul-searchers were at the Holiday Inn last Sunday buzzing from table to table for insights and inspirational gifts at ZuZu’s New Age Holiday Expo. I was amongst the readers in the back of the room. My table was the one with the brightly colored stones set in a spiral design atop a red silk tablecloth and hidden behind a white column. At first I was a little concerned by my obstructed view but even that proved to add to the ambiance of searching for understanding.

From the soul-searchers who found themselves seeking my counsel behind the white column, three limiting thought processes stood out that are definitely worth the consideration of an upgrade.

The first limiting thought process involved asking for what we want. Many participants were clear about what they didn’t want, but it ended there. We must be clear about what we want and how we are asking for it. If we give the heavens our negatives then that’s what we are going to get back. We are responsible for giving the heavens something to work with. Are we giving it our loves or our fears? And sometimes we don’t know until what we asked for comes back.

The second limiting thought process came from a participant who wanted me to foretell the future of her relationship. How often we look to a guarantee for comfort, but I believe our future is up to us. When we grow and change we have access to more optimal futures than we would otherwise be able to access. Therefore I find it more productive to focus on the growth and change side and let the future take care of itself.

Fear is faith that got turned inside out. When it’s there I’d rather explore it than dismiss it because so much good can come from the process of turning it back around.

The third limiting thought process came from a participant who was stuck in a relationship that she knew didn’t serve her. How does that happen? And it frequently does.

I have found myself asking many clients throughout the years, “Do you love this person or are you obsessed with getting them to love you?” We can’t tell what our true feelings are for someone when we believe this obsession to be love. Rather than let go when there is not enough common ground on which to build a deep and meaningful relationship we gradually become obsessed with trying to change the other person. Letting go would be more loving than holding on in this way.

Rather than attempt to get others to change, accept them where they are and upgrade your loving skills instead. Expect a learning curve, but it will be well worth the effort.

 “You cannot evaluate an insane belief system from within it.” says A Course in Miracles. If a thought process that we live by is creating pain, shame, stress or obsession it will eventually send us soul-searching. Don’t shame yourself or let yourself be shamed for having the courage to give life and love your best shot, but do have the humility to admit when your methods aren’t so fruitful.

My 3 upgrade suggestions:

·      Give the heavens your loves to work with rather than your fears.

·      Look for the growth rather than for the guarantee.

·      Love others because it brings you joy rather than to get love back.

Have you been feeling stressed, obsessed, shamed or pained?

Maybe it’s time for an upgrade?

Hope you can draw from this.

Warmly,

Trish